The Eye of the Needle

 Back in the 1980s I was a young(er) man. And a more voracious reader than I now am. And, back then, my reading was almost entirely fiction - over time, the market share of fiction has come down to around 50% which is still not bad 😁

Anyway.. back in the 80s there was this book, by Ken Follet, titled "Eye of the Needle" (they also made a movie, starring Donal Sutherland and Kate Nelligan, if I'm not mistaken, a damn good flick too, ALMOST as good as the book)

        

Back in the 80s,too, I used to go past the mosque at Thousand Lights, in Madras, on my way to school - and, on the outside walls they had painted several verses from the Quran of which one, particularly, stuck i mind (for the imagery, I guess). It said, "Verily, verily, I say unto thee, it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter Heaven"

Back in the 80s (and even in the 90s) I was a young(er) man. And the eye of the needle was something that I was familiar with. Buttons would come off my shirts, hooks off trousers, and the like. And a needle and thread used to be a handy thing in my travel kit. And threading a needle was child's play. Back then....

When was the last time YOU did that? Threading a needle? The process has not changed in perhaps 2000 years. 

Apparatus required: One Needle, one roll of thread.   

Procedure: Wet the tip of the thread to make the end stand straight. Pass it through the eye. Simple. Or, to be a Hercule Poirot, "Voila!"

As I said, the process has not changed.

So, there I was, yesterday, doing just that. One needle - check! A roll of thread (white colour) - Check. Wet the tip of the thread - check! And... "Voila"? Well, not exactly.

In fact not at all. Instead of a simple "Voila", I found myself smiling at my ineptitude - at first. I tried again. And smile some more. And tried again. A tiny frown, now, because I needed to con-cen-trate. And tried again. That frown? It grew into a grimace. A small muttered oath escaped my lips. And I tried again. A bigger, more pungent oath this time. And again, the oath now in Hindi (stronger, Indian masala) 

And thus it went. On & on.

What was that lesson about Robert Bruce and the spider? If at first you don't succeed, try, try and try again... 8 times that spider climbed and climbed to only fall? And succeeded on the 8th attempt? Or 9th? Whatever crap.... I did a spider, I did a Bruce and then, after perhaps 10 attempts, I gave it all up, threw the effing needle and thread away, threw my bleddy spectacles away too, threw my crappy hands up in the air and did what any sensible idiot/fool would have done at the very beginning...

Learn from the Yankees, I say.

I outsourced the bleddy job. One needle, one roll of thread, one maidservant who was in earshot. Job done!

And oh, one thing. Before I forget. Slight change in specs.

Apparatus required: One Needle. One Roll of Thread. One Pair of Good Eyes. There! Now you know.